Almost one year ago to the day I found myself sitting next to a broken down bus an hour outside of Palenque, Mexico. As I sat there, exhausted from the taxing two-day journey I began to question the trip. At times it was hard to understand God's purpose and plan for my presence there. Now, nearly a month after returning to the States, I am beginning to see the Lord's broader perspective. God pulled me away from everything I knew in order to reveal His greater plan for the world and my life. While I observed the dying babies in Vietnam, the HIV infected woman with Tuberculoses in Swaziland, and the orphan children in various parts of the world, I witnessed a God working His miracles through providing people and resources to His children. The process of seeing God as a good Creator in the midst of this was one of the most trying and difficult aspects of the trip, especially in Swaziland, Mozambique, and Cambodia. God revealed to me on a personal level and a global level that He is good, despite the presence of good and bad, poverty and riches, bondage and freedom. God opened my heart to the knowledge that He is a sovereign God who loves us more than we can comprehend. He desires us to join Him in the world as He brings His work to completion. It is my desire to serve this God- Jesus Christ- and make His name known.
The next step in serving our Father leads me to Talbot School of Theology in La Mirada, California to attend the Institute of Spiritual Formation as I pursue a Masters Degree in Spiritual Formation. I believe this program will uniquely prepare me in a holistic fashion for what God has for me in the future. I thank you all -my family and friends- for your prayers and encouragement and support this past year. I would not be where I am today without you.
"If all else fails, just pop 'em and run", Shane said. Welcome to Nova Pavlika, Ukraine.
The countryside of Ukraine, at least where we are, is split into many little villages of anywhere from 15 to 50 houses. Typically there is only one road; the larger villages may have a side street. The soviet mentality was to keep costs as low as possible, so all the houses are side by side just off the road, making connection to the above ground natural gas pipes as easy as possible. The pipes are above ground because they're cheaper to fix that way, even if it does look awful.
The best jobs to be had are in the coalmines. The technology that they use is probably the same that was used in the U.S. 50 years ago. Miners spend nearly 12 hours on their hands and knees in a tunnel that is 36 inches high, filled with 3-4 inches of water, and almost 90 degrees. All that makes breathing the coal dust constantly seem not quite as terrible. The average coal miner retires by age 43 because of health complications. Most don't see the age of 50. But their families need to eat, and in a good economy, Shane said that the mines were paying upwards of $1,000 per month. That much money feeds the family and still leaves plenty of money for vodka.
When we arrived, Shane told us that the alcoholism rate in the area was at 85%. The coal miners drink to alleviate the body pain from life in the mines. The rest drink just because that's what you do here. The men are lazy and the women work what jobs they can find. I've been here for just over 3 weeks and they've already celebrated 3 holidays. By celebrate I mean for 3 days everything grinds to a halt so that they can get drunk and either fight each other or pass out. Easter celebration was a drunken family picnic at the grave sight of deceased family members. Nothing screams "He is risen" like vodka and headstones.
A few nights ago Victor, the night watchman at the camp where we've been staying, wasn't able to come to work. His son was drunk and fighting. It was so bad that he called Shane for help. This was definitely the first time that ministry took me to the scene of a fight, and I gotta say, it was much more exciting than prayer walks or orphanage programs.
The guys loaded in Shane's jeep and headed off, not knowing what lay ahead or what we were getting into. Some of these coalminers have hands the size of my head and are built like Rocky, with all the personality of Mike Ditka. A few weeks ago I bit my lip and made my eyes water. This was shaping up to be either a very one-sided affair or an incredible display of the power of the Holy Spirit.
As soon as we got there, I jumped out and let these fists of fury go to work. Just kidding.
Victor met us at the door, his brow covered in sweat and visibly shaken. His son was inside, also covered in sweat and getting an earful from his mother. Although he is 30 years old, the scene looked like something you would expect from a mother and her teenager. The gist of the story is the same as many others in Ukraine. Vladimir is a 30 year old man who rarely works, moves from one gullable girl to the next, and spends most of his time drinking with his buddies. On this particular occasion he was provoked by several younger guys and felt the urge to prove himself. After all, 30 is the new 20. We got to talk for a while with Vladimir that night. He was still a little drunk but couldn't have been a more likeable guy. He's had struggles in his life and said that he drinks because his parents don't understand him. He may have been 30 but seems to have missed that maturation process that most of us in America get during high school and college. And Vladimir's is a typical story around here.
Be praying for Vladimir, that we'll get the opportunity to spend time with him while he's sober. Pray for his family; they are at the end of their rope with him and don't know what to do. And pray for the alcoholism in this area. Nothing is going to get better until these ridiculous social customs are abandoned.
I was captivated in my early years of high school by the awe and grandeur of the English Premier League. On Sunday nights I was mezmorized by the highlights of the weekend games. I longed for the opportunity to play on the perfectly groomed field with the best in the world while thousands cheered. After grasping the reality that I would never play for a premier
team I transitioned the dream into attending a match in London. When I
found out that we were going to be in London I phoned a
good friend seeking tickets (See the white V-neck). Being that this
unnamed source is well connected he was able to get to tickets to a
Chelsea game. As the game started the crowd settled in and the songs
began. In England the crowd sing songs of their teams greatness and
songs of insults to the opponents throughout the match. The game was short but amazing as I
saw the world's top players face-off at Stamford Bridge.
After the game Josh and myself rode the tube home. The West Ham fans were elated by the 1-1 draw to Chelsea. As I sat there with my blue and white Chelsea scarf I
became a bit intimidated by the insults and vicious hurls toward the
Chelsae players and fans. The West Ham fans are rugged English blokes
who are passionate about the sport and their team. For the remainder of
the 15 min subway ride I saw the deep camaraderie of these boys and men as they cheered and sang of their teams greatness. I thought to myself, "What a great sport, what an amazing game." It's crazy that chasing a soccer ball is able to bring people of all ages and backgrounds together.
The sport is exciting, but there is more to it. People are brought together through a unified goal and agenda. Soccer was a big part of life as I grew up. My weekends in junior high and high school were filled with soccer games and tournements. During the week we would practice with our team or find the nearest park to practice our skills. Although the sport was fun there was a lot more to it. Soccer brought community to me. We spent our weeks and weekends together, we shared hard and good experiences. We were quick to laugh and quick to yell at one another; we were brothers (brothers from soccer: Bryan left and Dave right).
While I was in Malawi I desired to seek out relationships with young men in the community through soccer. Several afternoons a week I would play in random games at the park. At first I was intimidated because I was the only white guy, my skills were a bit poor, and people were yelling at me from the sidelines. After a few times of playing the heckling became less and my skills improved. As the guys acclimated to my presence I was able to share my life and experience with them. Some days we didn't talk a lot and others we talked about American music and English football. Prior to leaving them I had the opportunity to share my testimony with 15 young men. Although no young men came to Christ that day I pray and believe that God drew a few of them to himself through my story and life.
Whether it's at Stamford Bridge or at a random park in Malawi people are being drawn into relationship through soccer. God has personally blessed me with my best friends in the States and opened up relationships in Malawi through this wonderfully amazing game.
September was a scary moment in the world economy as many of the world banks found themselves in a dire financial situation, resulting in the stock market plunging, sending a shock through all world markets. As Josh and myself intently followed the sliding markets a deep worry and fear slipped into my Spirit about the strength and stability of our countries economy. According to my friend who majored in business, our economy has a deep root in consumer faith. With every major and minor news networks closely following every dip in the market, strongly emphasizing the harsh realities we were soon to face, the consumer became frightened and I became frightened.
Six and a half months later our economic situation is looking bleaker and the consumer faith is less than optimistic. The predicted "Harsh Realities" are now amongst many people and their households. Daily I check the CNN website to acquire the latest market numbers hoping to see some improvement, but find myself disappointingly seeing red. After checking the markets I scroll back to the headlines which read of people losing jobs, seeking jobs, or tips on how to find a job. Each time I read the news I sense the despair and hopelessness that is resonating amongst many Americans. Currently our country is facing the worst economic situation since the depression.
My goal is not to discount the struggles and pain that many people face, rather convey the transformation of my mind over these past few months.
In September I was scared and nervous of the outcome of the financial crises. I did not nor do I want people to face tough times, as it is extremely devastating in a great number of respects. I personally do not want to face hard times, as it would take away from my "ideal" life. A fear of what the future would hold for my country, my family, my friends, and myself began to creep in. I found myself thinking and worrying about such things.
November and December were tough months on the Race as God was showing me the deeply rooted lies of my heart. I believe in God's goodness for the past and the present, but I have a hard time believing in His future goodness. Because I do not believe He is good for the future I am not able to trust Him for the future, thus forcing me to rely on myself. Past experience conveys that life has too many variables that hinder me from completely relying on myself. Now that the giant economic curve ball has been thrown in our direction there is no possible way that anyone, not even myself, can completely depend on themselves as means of provision. I have a choice, I can live in worry and fear or I can trust and believe in God's goodness. Past and present experience reveals that God is good, so logically I should believe He is going to be good tomorrow too.
As I exited one of the world's wealthiest cities and entered the world's poorest countries I noticed people's lack of concern for world economics and the financial crises. I observed the dire situations that were plagued with severe hopelessness hinged on HIV, Malaria, TB, and the many other diseases stealing their lives. I heard of their concerns for jobs so they could buy food and attend or send their kids to school. In this I saw God providing food for the hungry, giving money for school children, and healing for the sick.
Now in March I see that our economy is much worse than it was in September. In two months I leave the international travel circuit to return home to this unstable and unpredictable situation. To the disbelief of many foreigners, I am not rich and have a need to work. In June I will be searching for a job in one of the worst job markets in the States. Am I nervous (a little), but am I worried or fearful? NO!
God showed me that I do not believe in His goodness and do not trust Him for the future. He then opened my eyes to the realities of the world's poor. Through this my eyes were opened to God's desire and ability to provide in the most ominous situations. I have no reason not to believe in His ability to provide.
Many of you are worried or fearful of what next month may bring. I read a recent poll that 26 percent of Americans are fearful of losing their jobs. Don't get me wrong if I had a family and a mortgage I would not want to loss my job, but does that mean you should live in fear? No. God does not desire us to live in fear, He want us to trust in His goodness for the present and future. As God continues to transform my once fearful and worrisome mind He confirms His truth through Matthew 6.
"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."
I have made it to Eastern Europe. Our squad, minus team PI and Stephanie, are still in Africa until the end of March.
The World Race has never sent a squad to Eastern Europe so they sent team PI with Stephanie to confirm our squad's ministries, locate debrief locations, and research future contacts. Our European lovers, Dre and Shanda are in Hungary, while Ashley, Pamela and Stephanie are in Ukraine, leaving Josh and myself girl free in Romania :)
Our time thus far has been productive and refreshing. The first few days were spent behind our computers researching, emailing, and skyping with contacts around the country. After contacting a few ministries we set off for our visitation period. The people thus far have welcomed us with open arms and great food. During our time we heard the missionaries and pastors hearts for the Romanian people.
On Tuesday Josh and myself visited the Teen Challenge ministry outside of Bucharest. They provide a healthy Christ-centered environment for men addicted to drugs and alcohol to rehabilitate and grow in Christ. Their days are full of learning about God and themselves through Scripture while serving at the center and in the local community. While praying for the men prior to leaving God's consoling Spirit touched me, allowing me to feel a freedom and excitement I have only experienced on a few occasions. The freedom and excitement is the same as the men are experiencing as they feel the chains of drugs and alcohol fall from their lives. As God releases them from their imprisoned state the visions and excitement for life rise in their hearts.
At then end of the week we traveled to the Black Sea to visit a ministry for mentally disabled men and women. Silviu and his wife Gabi started the ministry in 2004 as God drew them to care for and show love to people who otherwise would not experience such provision. They have opened a day center where they give the mentally disabled an safe place to socialize, learn about Christ, and receive medical treatment from Gabi who is a medical doctor.
Teen Challenge and Silviu are only a few of the many people here in Romania serving those in need while conveying God's love and truth. It has been a great blessing and encouragement to observe God's work in this country.
February has taken me on a rigorous journey from South Africa to the center of Malawi. My least favorite part of the journey came at the Mozambique-Malawi boarder when I found out the gas we were carrying in the trailer leaked out and spilled onto some of our bags. As we discovered the news we came across several Somali refugees who had nothing. These men were forced from Malawi and found themselves stranded between the Mozambique-Malawi border. I had a difficult time getting frustrated with my oil stained things when I saw people with nothing. But once we arrived at our destination I came across my fuel soaked bag, with the memory of the refugees distant, I became quite flustered. After washing my clothes they no longer smelled and the gas smell departed from my bag. The sad part was I spent four mornings in a row becoming greatly frustrated, even to the point I wanted to just throw it all away, because of the gas. What a smuck right? We are working with people who have next to nothing and I have recent memories of stranded refugees, yet I still have the nerve to whine about my gas-ridden possessions.
God is teaching me a great deal about perspectives. If I had an appropriate perspective I would have seen that my most of my things will be clean and that I am blessed to have those things. I guess some days it is hard to understand that truth when all your current life possessions are temporally stained.
After several days of struggling God opened up the next chapter in character development- expectations. This year has been a constant lesson in expectations. Half our squad spent last month worked with a church ministry in Mozambique. There days were productive and their time meaningful. I expected to have a similar experience of feeling needed and connected to a church. When the first week failed to meet those expectations I became frustrated and irritated. Why were we not doing what I thought we were doing? We are doing some things- showing the Jesus movie, house visits, and hanging out with the contacts-but most of our time is spent African style- sitting around and chilling to the max. Because of this I am struggling with a good attitude. Although the ministry is not what I intended God has used us to lead several people to Christ, teach in churches, and encourage those around us. I am learning that life is not what I expect or want, rather about God's work. It's good to have expectations, but they must not hinder us from His work.
Godly perspective and healthy expectations are two areas God continues to refine. Don't worry my things are fine and we are working with the contacts to make better use of our time-you know create a win-win.
Our team had the opportunity to spend one week working in Swaziland. Although our time was short it was impactful. I learned that the country has one of the highest AIDS rate in the world and that the life expectancy is the lowest in the world. The Swazis have a great struggle finding a source of food, water, and income. Their current situation is very difficult and seemingly hopeless. I personally had the opportunity to hear and observe first hand the hardships of a few of the Swazi people.
The story that impacted me greatly was that of a twenty-six year old woman infected with HIV. She resides at her parents homestead with her 4-month old son. Soon after she became pregnant her husband left her behind to care for herself and the baby. She may have been able to survive ok if she had not been infected with TB during her pregnancy. The result of the TB is that she is not able to care for herself, let alone her child. Her child sits by her side hungry because she is not able to breast feed him and her family does not have the money to buy him milk. When I met her she was shaking in a chair outside of her house. She did not say much, but when she did the tears fell down her face. I could sense her helplessness and the burden she carried for not being able to care for her son. The reality is this woman is going to die within the next several months and leave her child with her parents who struggle providing for their children. She is going to pass carrying this burden of that she brought a child into the world who she could not provide for, that she most likely passed HIV to this child, and that she burden her family by getting pregnant.
When I see something like this it is hard for me to say that God is good and see His love for His creation. My only answer for this and all the other pain in the world -whether it be in Swaziland, Thailand, the States, or anywhere else- is that we live in a fallen world and God, recognizing the state of His creation, sent His son to save us from the fallen state. Those who believe in Him are saved from all this pain and suffering. But as we go through the pain, as we see the suffering, we must take comfort in the fact that God is a personal God who is here in our time of need. He desires us to take our burdens and pain to Him, to take his light yoke, and to seek Him in our time of need so that He may comfort us. I am so glad I serve a God who is personal and loving, a God who has carried more burdens than I will be able to fathom, and a God who went to the cross for us.
My team of 16 people traveled to the northern part of southern Mozambique to partner with a local missionary, Yako. He, his wife, and two children moved to Mozambique from South Africa around seven years ago. They heard God's call to reach out to the people in Mozambique. After a cyclone hit in 2006 his heart turned to the orphans. Currently they have twenty-five children whom they care for. Although the children are looked after they are not adequetly cared for due to the lack of resources. Yako is forced to divide his personal support between his family and the children, around one thousand dollars a month.
Our main objective at the orphanage was to move the children to a new location. Once we transferred all the children and their stuff to the new location we began to build- bathroom, kitchen, tents, and the foundation for new building. The heat and the unforgiving sun took its toll on our energy supplies. At the end of our time we were able to accomplish a lot, giving Yako a good start with the new location.
Prior to moving the orphanage we had a few open days with the children. We filled our time playing games and assisting them with their practical needs. A few of the nurses on our team created a medical clinic to care for their cuts, scrapes, infections, and illnesses.
It was a hard but wonderful experience to spend a few weeks with Yako's ministry. Although the children have a difficult life their attitudes and joy does not reflect their situation. A few people from our team plan to go back to the orphanage next month to further assist Yako and the children.
I find myself in Africa. It is weird that only a few weeks ago I was in London and now I'm in Africa. Life seems a bit odd going from one place to the next-not just a short drive rather a long flight to another part of the world. We traveled from wealth to poverty in just a few days. Yes, London has poverty, but it is masked by the wealth. Here in Mozambique the poverty cannot be hidden, as it is everywhere.
Vilanculos, the small town we are working out of, has poverty as well as a bit of wealth. The wealth in this city is not Aston Martin and Burberry rather a home and a vehicle. It appears that most have a home- this is quite relative and not what I would consider pleasant- but beyond that there is not a lot of material wealth. The people in the cities seem to have a few advantages: clean water in close proximity and some food. Overall it is hard to make accurate conclusions of the lives here, as I have not spent a great deal of time. My comparison here is based on living near the city and living in the bush-the countryside of Mozambique where many live with limited resources.
The bush is a very rugged lifestyle. Food sources are limited and the nearest town is a long walk. Cars are not common; if you see them they are workers for local companies. Running water is a mirage while the well is reality. The orphanage we worked with was placed some distance from a well, about a 30 min walk one way. It was a blessing that we had a wheel barrel while most carried the water on their heads (some people had a shorter walk). Regardless of the distance and the method of transport fatigue followed the well run. On most days our team did three water runs: morning, afternoon, and night. The heat of the day, beginning as early as eight in morning, ensured weariness. By eleven the shade was the only oasis for our team. Often times we hid until the sun tired in the late afternoon. Our time spent there was short, whereas the orphans and the others have settled into their daily reality. Being a westerner we have an escape, while they are stuck.
So far I have not spent a lot of time reflecting about all I have seen over the past two weeks. I wish I had more to say, but this is all for now.
(See the white V-neck). Being that this
unnamed source is well connected he was able to get to tickets to a
Chelsea game. As the game started the crowd settled in and the songs
began. In England the crowd sing songs of their teams greatness and
songs of insults to the opponents throughout the match. The game was short but amazing as I
saw the world's top players face-off at Stamford Bridge. 
The sport is exciting, but there is more to it. People are brought together through a unified goal and agenda. Soccer was a big part of life as I grew up. My weekends in junior high and high school were filled with soccer games and tournements. During the week we would practice with our team or find the nearest park to practice our skills. Although the sport was fun there was a lot more to it. Soccer brought community to me. We spent our weeks and weekends together, we shared hard and good experiences. We were quick to laugh and quick to yell at one another; we were brothers (brothers from soccer: Bryan left and Dave right). 
"Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own."